IS IT JUST
NEW YORKERS, OR IS EVERYONE A LITTLE NUTS?
"Tawk" to a New "Yawka" lately? It's that accent
recognize it a mile away--along with the attitude. In "the city"
it's a survival mechanism, in the country--obnoxious. Welcome to
the running saga of weekend culture shock. Or is it more like mass
Let's see. New
Yorkers begin and end their workweek like herds of cattle--jammed
into smothering subways and buses so tight "up close and personal"
takes on a whole new meaning. Then they'll jockey for position at
a deli for coffee like NBA centers "boxing out" opponents for a
rebound with elbows fixed like bayonets. And before actually reaching
the office, at least one sociopath will be stared down, two lunatic
bike messengers buzzing curbside pedestrians cursed, and a gauntlet
of kamikaze cabbies fixated on anything but safe driving dared.
Friday evening, they're so desperate for the calmer pace of the
Poconos, they risk what's left of their sanity just to get through
the dreaded rush hour traffic on 80--only to complain all weekend
long that nobody moves their "you know what" fast enough. Hello?
Is there any Valium in the house?
Of course, New
Yorkers don't own exclusive bragging rights to irrational behavior.
Locals twitch at the first sign of New York plates, moan about congested
roads and parking lots, crowded stores, markets, and the like, but
then snatch tourist dollars faster than a pickpocket working Penn
here's a reality check: There's no Ford or BMW plant in the Poconos,
so lighten up; New Yorkers may be like the spouse you can't live
with and can't (or shouldn't) shoot, but they play an integral role
in the region's food chain. So mind your (table) manners!
is unquestionably a fine place in which to live, but since perfection
is said to be the exclusive province of Heaven, perhaps making the
best of the here and now might not be such a bad idea while waiting
to find out.